"Act II: Xtreme Butter" Popcorn is Anything But Xtreme, and Boy, We're Xtremely Pissed
As we were browsing the snack aisle for something to make us even more upset about our body image, we noticed that Act II, one of the world's leading popcorn brands, had released a self-esteem-destroying variety called "Xtreme Butter." We found out later that this flavor had been out for quite some time already, but we were surprised to have never stumbled upon it before, especially given our tendency to habitually seek out food that hurts our bodies.
We were feeling particularly unhealthy, and we wanted to keep it that way, so we bought a six pack on impulse just to see how "Xtreme" this flavor truly was. Before the purchase, we were under the impression that the "Movie Theatre Butter" variety was the king of the unhealthy snack world, so we were surprised to find that Act II was attempting to outdo themselves.
Anyway, we tried it, and we're xtremely sad to say that Act II: Xtreme Butter is anything but Xtreme. The lack of butter is criminal, and I guess Act II just likes to fucking lie to their customers. Wow. Incredible. Sad. We forced ourselves to finish the steaming bag of bullshit and then contemplated ending it all for ten straight hours.
So check out the Amazon reviews. Regardless of the fact that all three of these are nearly impossible to understand, it's pretty clear that we share a similar hatred toward the total goddamn joke that is "Act:II Xtreme Butter." So read the reviews, buy a pack for yourself, and be pissed with us.
AMAZON REVIEWS:
Stickin' it to man and throwing it away. Hell yeah. Thank you for your heroism. #FuckXtremeButter
Definitely won't find a "butter explosion" here. #FuckXtremeButter
SHAME. Sounds like someone needs to get their "Act" together. #FuckXtremeButter